Energetic Patterns

Boundaries: A Case Study

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

When people come into my office with relationship problems, they do not always realize they’re dealing with boundary issues. Many people think if they’re being treated badly in relationship, they must be doing something wrong. This is generally due to a lack of understanding about boundaries, and this lack of understanding usually stems from a place of unworthiness. The person being mistreated believes they’re flawed in some way, and makes compromises to stay in relationships where they are suffering. Boundary issues almost always arise when a person doesn’t feel lovable, and consequently, they’re willing to do almost anything to get another person’s approval. Because they don’t love themselves, they are dependent on others to be sources of love and validation.

Spiritual Maturity and Depth Hypnosis

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

People often ask me if Depth Hypnosis is like psychotherapy. If psychotherapy is a process of identifying psychological disturbance and then talking about it, possibly while working with prescription drugs to reduce symptoms, then it cannot be said that Depth Hypnosis is psychotherapy. In Depth Hypnosis there is no process of diagnosis and no use of medication. Rather, it is more a process of inquiry and discovery – particularly about client experience that might be hidden or unknown.

In “The Ten Lessons of Psychedelic Psychotherapy, Rediscovered” Neal M. Goldsmith suggests that it might be more accurate to look at symptoms of imbalance such as anxiety and depression as an indicator of spiritual immaturity rather than as an indicator of psychological pathology. This is an intriguing idea – and certainly one that resonates with the practice of Depth Hypnosis.

Healing Your Mind by Dropping into Your Heart

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

Sometimes people come into my office struggling with a problem, and whenever they try to address it, they find themselves stuck in “mind loops.” Mind loops are characterized by sequences of labyrinthine reasoning containing dead ends and knotted thoughts that fold back on themselves without producing the hoped-for clarity.

People who experience this type of mental confusion are usually viewed as having a high level of intellectual intelligence, and tend to work in professions that require the use of their intellect. These people are able to generate logic sequences that make them valuable contributors at work. This capacity, however, can often send the same people into mental traps when they try to apply these logic sequences to experiences that do not necessarily respond to logic.

Letting Go of Negative Emotion with Thupten Jinpa, Ph.D.

Thupten Jinpa explains how mindfulness and compassion practices can help us let go of negative emotion and lead happier and healthier lives. Excerpted from a talk given at the Sacred Stream Center in Berkeley, CA. Thupten Jinpa is the author of A Fearless Heart: How the Courage to Be Compassionate Can Transform Our Lives, and English translator for His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

Relationship forms the core of our experience as humans. We define ourselves and are defined by the nature of our relating. The Buddhist concept of interdependence affirms that nothing exists independently. Everything exists interdependently. In relationship, we do not and cannot exist independently of one another.

It is through relationship that we come to know ourselves. It is through relating that we hold up a mirror to others for them to come to know themselves. Others do the same for us, providing us with information about ourselves that we could not see without the lens of relating. In this way, relationship provides us with a path of revelation. As we learn more about ourselves, our experience takes on richer meaning.

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

Last time, we were talking about Trungpa’s reassurance that everything that comes up in our experience is workable. This idea that everything is workable is related to the Mahayana Buddhist idea that everything in our experience is part of the path to enlightenment. This is very important to remember when we find ourselves wanting to pull away from our experience in relating to others because it seems too overwhelming.

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

So how are you doing listening to yourself? Are you hearing yourself saying anything negative to yourself? Are you seeing your own self-talk reflected in how you talk to others? Are others having a reaction? Is it hard to ignore or deny that reaction?

Here’s a hint: There is probably a part of yourself that is hearing that negative self-talk and having a reaction similar to those around you who you might be treating in the same way. This is another big benefit of relationship. This is another way in which we learn about ourselves or see ourselves through the lens of relationship.

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

Last time, we were discussing the all-too-common tendency to think that if we just ignore a problem it will eventually go away on its own or we won’t feel its effect. And then ignoring the problem leads to confusion about what is real and what is true. Unfortunately, one of the most common responses to this state of confusion is to go into denial about the fact that the effect of not being present is causing a problem. Denial is what I what I would like to focus on today.

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

In a recent podcast, Robert Thurman, noted Buddhist scholar, asked, “What would you do if you realized that you would never be able to get off the subway car you were on this morning – that you were going to be with those people for infinity?”

For one thing, it would probably change the way we viewed those people. If we are all in a subway car together cruising through eternity, it would probably be a good idea to start figuring out how to get along.

I have spent many years trying to help people figure out how to get along through my Depth Hypnosis practice and teaching. Mostly I try to help people figure out how to get along with themselves – because you really can’t get along with anyone else until you have yourself figured out.

Personal Responsibility: A Buddhist Perspective on Relationship

By Isa Gucciardi, Ph.D.

Relationship forms the core of our experience as humans. We define ourselves and are defined by the nature of our relating. In Buddhism, there is a concept called “interdependence” which postulates that nothing exists independently. Everything exists interdependently. Applying this concept to relationship implies that we do not and cannot exist independently of one another.

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